Not many of my friends from college knew this about me, but in order to make a living while I was studying for my degree, I did online sex work. It wasn’t something I planned to do long-term, but I ended up doing it for a number of years to get myself through school. Like any job, I had good and bad experiences with sex work, but I enjoyed it overall.
When people talk about sex work, most folks automatically think of FSSW (full service sex work). However, there are many jobs within the sex industry that don’t fall under FSSW. Sex work of various forms has become widely accessible through online platforms and websites that offer escorting services. From stripping and sugaring to camming and photo sales, there are numerous jobs that appeal to different people to best suit their needs. Here’s an explanation of some of the services I offered and my experiences with them.
My biggest focus in sex work was actually sexting services. It didn’t require much prep work, I was able to do it from anywhere, and I found it to be the most enjoyable of all the services I offered. A lot of my sexting clients were regulars who would purchase a session every few days or so. I felt super comfortable sexting clients because I was able to take a moment to think about what I wanted to say, as opposed to video sessions, where I had to think on my feet a lot faster. I’ve always preferred texting people to phone calls (and sometimes even in-person conversations), so this was a natural fit for me. I also really enjoyed the freedom of working anywhere. I often did sexting sessions in between classes to fill up my day without overworking myself.
While camming and clip sales seems to be some of the most popular forms of sex work I see on social media these days, I didn’t actually dabble in either too much. I made only a handful of clips for sale and never actually did a live, open chat room. I was hesitant to face the pressure of hosting an open room and keeping multiple people entertained at once. I did, however, engage in a lot of private audio and video sessions.
These, of course, were more profitable than sexting sessions, but definitely required more effort on my part. While audio sessions were a bit easier to manage, it still stressed me out when I wasn’t exactly sure how to guide the scene (improv has never been my strong suit). Video sessions, on the other hand, required more prep time. I had to find a sexy outfit, do my hair and makeup, and make sure the background of my shot was tidy. It felt a bit like the anxiety of getting ready for a date that way. Despite having the benefits of a large sex toy collection, which allowed me to fill up time with lots of exciting visuals, it was a more exhausting job that made me really nervous at times. It’s probably not surprising that I did a lot less of these sessions in favor of some low-key sexting on my commute to and from campus.
Part of the sex work I did felt a lot more like counseling. Obviously, talking to a sex worker isn’t a replacement for a mental health professional, but when my clients had problems specifically about sex or kink, they found it useful to talk to someone in the sex industry as opposed to a therapist.
Part of my consulting work included couple’s sessions, where a couple would both join in on either a sexual session or a guided conversation about their sex life. The feedback I received on these consulting sessions was always really positive and it felt great to know that I was facilitating real couples’ sex lives. This was probably the sex work I did that felt most meaningful to me, as it aligned with my goal of helping people explore sex and kink in a safe, fun environment.
Keyholding was a long-term service I did for a few regular clients. Instead of paying by the session, they would make a monthly tribute for me to control their orgasms. Some literally wore a chastity cage and mailed me the key to their release (I always made sure a spare was available to them in case of an emergency), while others were more figurative with this service, and did full-time orgasm control on the honor system. Keyholding was one of the more exciting services for me because I loved working with clients long-term. Getting to know them and their kinks while building that relationship of trust was enjoyable for both of us. Also, wearing the keys to their chastity devices was always super empowering.
Sugaring was absolutely my most profitable type of sex work, but it was harder to find suitable sugar daddies. With these clients, I had long-term arrangements in exchange for a weekly/monthly allowance. While the income was great, I actually had some bad experiences with sugaring that made it more demanding. One of my clients was abusive and took advantage of my difficult financial position for his own benefit, which was really hard to deal with at the time. However, the good experiences I had with sugaring were really great. Talking to rich men who wanted my attention was always a confidence-booster. Also, getting a cash bonus for each orgasm I had during video sessions with one particular client was a great motivator to push my limits and leave me feeling great about the scenes we did. I had the means to treat myself often and even was able to afford frequent weekend vacations with my partner at the time, which was a new luxury to me. In the situations where I felt safe with my clients, sugaring was really beneficial to me.
So long as my clients adhered to courtesy guidelines, sex work was a really enjoyable experience. I had full control over when I worked, what I did, and who I worked with. Of course, there were a few bad clients and loads of time-wasters, but the clients I saw more than once were always amazing to work with. I’m thankful for most of the experiences I had in this industry.
Are you curious about other types of sex work? Do you think you’d ever want to get into sex work yourself? Do you have experience doing something else in the sex industry? Feel free to ask questions or share your stories!
This article was sponsored.
All writing and opinions are my own.