I always want to promote that sex and BDSM be practiced as safely as possible to avoid unnecessary risks and minimize unwanted pain. To make aftercare and sex safety more accessible for everyone, I suggest everyone invest in a “sex safety kit”.
Start by getting a container—something like a plastic bin or even a toiletry bag—and filling it with any necessary items to maintain safety for your specific lifestyle. Price estimations for the finished kit will vary based on how prepared you want to be, and what kinks you personally practice.
Here are some basic ideas to get you started:
Condoms: Always keep extra condoms in your sexual safety kit, even if you use other forms of birth control in case your usual form of birth control is ineffective due to missing a pill, etc.
Dental Dams: Used for oral stimulation of the vulva or anus, dental dams are good to have around in case you need them. You can also cut the tip off a condom and slit it lengthwise for a DIY dental dam.
Gloves: Gloves are a great safety item for vaginal or anal fingering/fisting. Especially good in cases where one partner is menstruating. Be sure you have non-latex gloves if your partner has an allergy!
Lubricant: A small bottle of water-based lube is good to have around for assistance during vaginal or anal sex. It can also be used as a massage aid during aftercare.
Wet Wipes: I suggest keeping a pack of sex toy wipes or even baby wipes near the bed for an easy clean-up after sex.
Bandages: Keep a box of various-sized Band-Aids in your kit in case of scratches or cuts during a scene.
Gauze Pads: For open wounds, have sterile gauze around to apply pressure and stop bleeding. Remember to wear gloves when giving first aid!
Ace Bandage: For common sprains such as the wrist and ankle during sex, keep an ace bandage in your kit.
Scissors/Knife: Super important when doing bondage scenes for a quick release from ropes.
Water/Sports Drink: Perfect for rehydrating and calming down after a scene. Tops and bottoms should always take breaks for water after playing!
Burn Cream: When playing with hot wax or fire, a tube of burn cream is a good thing to have around in case of accidents.
Sharps Bin: Playing with needles or disposable scalpels? Don’t just throw these items in the trash. Dispose of them properly by keeping a sharps bin in your play-space.
Cold Pack: To bring down the swelling after impact play, apply cold to the area.
Hot Pack: To increase blood flow after impact, apply heat to the area. This results in deeper bruises for those of you who like showing off.
Spare Keys: When using handcuffs or padlocks, keep an extra set of keys in your safety kit. You never know when you’re going to need an immediate release from bondage.
Pain Reliever: For minor pains and aches, have a bottle of pain reliever around. Great for headaches that occur due to endorphin rushes after intense scenes. Keep in mind that pain killers like aspirin and ibuprofen are blood-thinners, so don’t do needle-play or blood-play after taking these medications.
Emergency Contraceptive: While expensive to have around, emergency contraceptive is a great thing to keep in your safety kit if you can afford it. Remember that these expire so always keep it up to date!
Pregnancy Tests: To keep pregnancy concerns at bay, I suggest keeping a handful of tests in your safety kit to avoid rushing out for new tests if you’re an anxious person like me. Drug store brands are just as effective as brand name, and are way cheaper!
Lotion: Keep a bottle of lotion in your kit to soothe your partner after a scene. Unscented is best for red bottoms or with people who have allergies but for an aftercare massage over unbroken skin, try a relaxing scent. Avoid using lotion on broken skin.
Sweet Snack: Snacks are important for bringing the body’s blood sugar back to normal after a scene—especially those involving needles or blood. Be very careful and make sure this level is kept healthy when playing with a diabetic partner.
STD Status: It’s important to know your STD status when playing with others and having your results on hand can serve as a great tool for partner’s peace of mind. Sharing results with your sexual partners is a good way to ensure everyone’s safety and on-going consent. If you’re unsure about your STD status or need to get retested (ideally, you should test every few months or with each new partner–whichever is first) you can find a testing center easily online through STD Check. Results through STD Check are available online where you can easily access them and hare this information with your partners.
Emergency Information: In times of emergency, we need to have information prepared. Keep a list of nearby hospitals, doctors, and sexual health centers in your kit. Also keep a list of medications each partner is taking, as well as any other important health information (blood type, emergency contact information, known illnesses, procedures, mental disorders, etc.).
This is simply a list of suggestions and should not be considered to be medical advice of any kind. The author of this list has no medical degree and is speaking from experience about things that you may find useful to have around for safety’s sake. Always take proper precautions when playing with risky kinks or dangerous equipment.
xx SF
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